I hate having to work through lunch. I don't have enough grounds to really complain about my situation. I'm very lucky to be working a job for 37.5 hours a week and get paid for 40. Our boss still gives us an hour lunch break. Thats pretty cool, but eating at my desk while working photoshop during the lunch hour definitely makes me seem tense. I get a bit of anxiety like I can't work fast enough or do enough things. I'm trying to complete multiple tasks without any relaxation. I can only blame myself though because I had a doctor's appointment yesterday morning in downtown St. petersburg @ 8:15am, which wouldn't be bad if I didn't have to be at work at 8:30 and work wasn't in Dunedin which is a good 30-40 minutes north.
It was good to go back to the doctor. Yeah, not many people share that love of visiting doctors like I have right now. Its been almost 2 years since I was at a job long enough to receive medical benefits. Thats really sad, but this marks a change. Its 1/4 the way through 2004 and I've been depressed. So depressed that I have no vision. I think I've been depressed for 2 years and not a deep depression that makes me not want to live. But its severe enough to make meo not appreciate the beauty in things around me. To sum all that up, I have a long going case of designer's block. I would say aritst's block, but I don't feel I fit into the definition of an artist because the skills ain't there. An artist who doesn't express true happiness in his life and world is as ugly as unmolded clay. Sure there is potential in the clay, but unused expression can be costly. This is me, convincing my ass to move.
I have a temporary solution for depression and that "blah" feeling one gets sometimes that makes art seem a little pointless and the world seem uninspiring: come with us to see the Dale Chihuly exhibit in St. Pete this weekend. His work is like light therapy, like when people up north get depressed because it's winter for 11 1/2 months out of the year and they have to go sit under "sun" lamps to feel better. I think this is what it must feel like to sit under those lamps adn feel better. Give us a call if you think you might be in.
Posted by: Amy at March 23, 2004 01:56 PM
Omar,
When I get the Artists block, I decide to have fun with it. Create a project that has nothing to do with work. NO stress. Do something that selfishly satifies you. It's not for your boss, a client, or THE MAN. It's for Omar.
Apply paint to canvas without a plan. Snap photos during your lunch hour. The result is meaningless. The process is everything.
Ryan
Posted by: Ryan at March 23, 2004 04:01 PM
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